Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Contributed by Bing:
Sa mga matatanda.... . . . . . .
pero hindi pa tayo yun!!!
An elderly gentleman...
Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.'
The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!'
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says:
'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?'
'I feel just like a newborn baby.'
'Really!? Like a newborn baby!?'
'Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man.
He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'
Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital.
After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.
On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.
'I don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.'
Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. 'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks.
'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?'
'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks.
'No, I can remember it.'
'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so's not to forget it?'
He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.'
'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, please write it down?' she asks.
Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!'
Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.
She stares at the plate for a moment. 'Where's my toast ?'
A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
'So I hear you're getting married?'
'Do I know her?'
'This woman, is she good looking?'
'Is she a good cook?'
'Naw, she can't cook too well.'
'Does she have lots of money?'
'Nope! Poor as a church mouse.'
'Well, then, is she good in bed?'
'I don't know.'
'Why in the world do you want to marry her then?'
'Because she can still drive!'
Three old guys are out walking.
First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?'
Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!'
Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer.'
A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.'
'Really,' answered the neighbor . 'What kind is it?'
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'
The doctor said, 'I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool..
After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'
Now, before you forget, send them on to some other folks you know who could use a good laugh!!!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
This was contributed by Men Venida-Abot.
Yesterday, December 29, several of us visited Rory in his residence in Green Heights Village in Paranaque. This was planned by Ate Marynat and was pursued when the planned post-Christmas Party didn’t take off. It turned out to be a very happy occasion even if it was only a small group that made it. More so because we got to see Rory, whom we last had a chance to be with during the despedida for Marybeth and Willy in May. It was also a rare opportunity to be with Captain Rudy and Ineng whose company we last had during his birthday blow-out also in May.
Others who made it were Ate Marynat, the organizer, Alot, Ebo and me. Bert and Marie wanted very much to join us but couldn’t make it because of a scheduled activity yesterday and today (golf perhaps) at the Riviera. He earlier told us that he was only available on December 28. Ed begged off because had a lunch date (must be a long lunch because our scheduled visit was at 3 pm, way past lunch time). Felino wasn’t sure because he would be coming from Bulacan and might be caught in the traffic. Lina was supposed to spend the holidays with her husband (yes her husband is back from Japan) in Bicol. Tess never responded to previous posts on the plan to hold a post-Christmas get-together while Baby doesn’t really know Rory that much, as they were not classmates in DPS.
Lina, Rory’s wife was there, together with two of their five children – Ryan, and their only daughter, whose name I didn’t get (sorry). Ryan, turned out to be an elementary classmate of another Ryan – Rudy and Ineng’s son, Ryan. They had fun reminiscing how naughty Rudy’s Ryan was but who nonetheless, performed well in academics. (Kay isay pa daa ma mana? and while we noted the strong physical resemblance of father and son, mas gwapo man daa siya sabi ni Rudy).
It was still pot luck but minus the pampa-alta-presyon (crispy pata, adobo, etc). Instead, we had lumpiang sariwa (from Conti’s pastry and restaurant), which Marynat truly believed was prepared by Rudy. That’s how credible Rudy is to Ate Marynat! There was also pancit malabon, sotanghon, pichi-pichi, crema de f..r..uta (you should see Rory roaring with laughter when Rudy pronounced it minus the “r”), buko pandan ice cream, bread, grapes, and pineapple. Marynat brought the grapes. She said she’ll bring fruits but she couldn’t carry something heavy (operada kaya), so I was sure she wouldn’t bring tipong, langka or pakwan.
Rory’s place (house and lot) is quite big and could accommodate our group should we plan another get-together where we can bring food. Distance is however, a problem. I think it’s only Bert, Rudy and Baby who live in that part of Metro Manila. It was a good thing that Ebo could make it, so Marynat, Alot and I were able to hitch a ride with him. And he was a revelation, kalog man palan si Ebo. He made us all laugh during the party and on our trip to and from Rory’s house. Move aside, Bert, you’ve got competition!
Rory and Lina, and everyone enjoyed the three hours or so visit and get-together. I’m sure I also contributed to Rory’s enjoyment.Ogmahon siya kayang pagparakarawan an gurang na binatna. Kaya, sige na lang, “Te’ kung saan ka masaya, supurtahan kita!”
2010 is still more than a year ahead so we’re hoping that by that time, Rory would be up and about and together with wife Lina, will be able to attend our 43rd Class Reunion.
Below are the pictures of the get together, which I hope I’ll be able to upload. Yes finally, I did.
Video Clips of the Years Spent in Daet Parochial School
- DPS Elementary Years - Part I
- DPS Elementary Years - Part II
- DPS Elementary Years - Part III
- DPS High School Years - Part I
- DPS High School Years - Part II
- DPS High School Years - Part III
- DPS High School Years - Part IV
- DPS High School Years - Part V
- DPS High School Years - Part VI
- DPS High School Years - Part VII